Monday, August 17, 2009

Obstacles for Exercise

Everyone who doesn't exercise has excuses for why they can't exercise. Today, I'm no exception. I haven't worked out in over a week because of this move (see, there's my excuse) and today was to be the day I started my Slim Series rotation.

I could have gotten up at 5:30 to make that happen, but I wasn't ready to start my day quite that early after an abrupt end to our summer (another excuse). My plan was to get the kids off to school for their first day of school, come back home, and work out. I even dressed in my workout clothes first thing this morning so I wouldn't forget.

I took the younger kids to their K-8 school and it started out just fine. My 5th grade daughter ran off to find her class on her own. My 8th grade son took off in another direction. I went in with my 1st grade son to meet his teacher. He loved his class, his own desk, seeing his name on his desk and immediately sat down. I took a few pictures and had him get up so I could get the traditional "1st day of school" photo with his teacher.

I left to find my 8th grade son. I wasn't sure if he'd find his class easily since those rooms aren't marked with the teacher names. I entered the upper grader hall and it was PACKED with very excited and loud chattering young teens. I had to "excuse me" my way through and asked a few stray boys where Mr. Wilkinson's room was. I walked in and found my son and a few other boys in the class. After introducing myself to the teacher and taking a few pictures of my son in his desk (he kept telling me not to -- I would have stopped at one, but he had his hands covering his face, as usual). I overheard the other boys saying "that kid's in my seat." I've never seen bullies in action before, but these kids fit the bill. I would have loved to have said "Hey, he can sit there if he wants" but I know that meddling moms aren't an 8th grade boy's idea of being helpful. So I just watched a bit. The boys wore black with skulls on their shirts. The one talking actually had a wide black wrist band with metal studs. Ack! I didn't see these boys as a threat -- just little punks who probably didn't understand much about their value in life.

Eventually my son got up from his chair and kind of looked around for where he should be. I asked the kids as they wandered over, "Do you have assigned seating in this class?" and they said they did. The teacher corrected them and said, "You can sit where you want now, but I'm going to switch you around later" to which they moaned and acted like they should be able to because that's where they sat last year. He told them he knew them well enough to see where they should sit.

My son recognized another boy from church coming into class. He walked towards him, but that boy didn't notice and started talking to someone else. I wanted to make it all work, but knew I had to leave. My son sat in the back by himself and the bell rang. I left and immediately burst into tears. In all our years of thinking of moving, this was my only concern. This particular child has thrived in the nurturing country school where we used to go. He was there from Kindergarten until last year and I took him away from all that. He doesn't make friends easily. He's meek and wonderful. It just broke my heart to walk out, knowing that he wasn't cared for in any way. The nurturing environment was gone.

I tried to go take a picture of my 5th grade daughter, but her door was closed and class was beginning. Being a new mom, I didn't know the teacher at all to just peek my head in (like I'd do at our old school) and say "I just need to take a picture" and would do it super fast. So I just walked away, compounding my sadness.

I decided to go look at the 8th grade class one more time to see if anyone sat by my son. I walked back down and looked through the classroom door window. No one was sitting by my son in the back. I managed to find my sun glasses as I walked out the second time so I could hide my sadness. The first day of school has always been such an exciting day for our family and I could see it in the other parent's eyes. I didn't want them to see my eyes today.

So I've been crying & praying most of the morning. I don't feel like working out. I'm drained and I'd rather just take a hot bath or go back to bed. But you know what? I'm not going to do that. I still have on my workout clothes. I know where my weights are. I have my Slim Series dvd in the dvd player ready to go and I'm going to do it. Debbie will smile and help me through this next hour and I'll be glad to focus on something else. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. We shall see if I'm glad I did it or not.

Edited to add: My son is doing much better in school. He's been hanging around a good group of boys from church and seems pretty happy when he comes home. He never tells me much about it, but I've heard from the other moms (and one teacher) that he's been having fun with these boys, jokes around with them, and feels quite comfortable. *phew!*

2 comments:

  1. I am sooo sorry to read this. I feel your pain. We moved 1500 miles away from our comfort zone 3 years ago. My son was very happy in the Christian school he attended. It was a clsoed enrollment so all the kids he had been in church with since a kid he also was in K-5 with. they were all friends and church buddies and it was a good group of kids. the moms were all friends with me and the teachers were all my friends from church. It was a great school too. But... then we moved. My son started 1st grade in a new Christian school. no closed enrollment so some of the kids in class did n ot go to church at all and we knew no one. My son was picked on and made to feel like an outcast. I did not know who to turn to as I knew no one anywhere. I felt sad and yet the kids surviced that first year here. It still makes me sad to not go ot the other Christian school but I guess it is a right of passage for kids to go through these hard tihngs sometimes. Prayed for you and your son tonight.

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  2. Thanks so much for your thoughts and your prayer. My son came home glad he was home, with a few exciting things to report, but mostly kept saying "Why can't we just go back to Fieldbrook?" I'm sure it's going to be tough for him at the start. (My high school kids said it wasn't much better there yesterday -- their school isn't nearly as friendly as their other high school). Hopefully time will allow them to make some good friends who they can enjoy being with each day.

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