Accountability

Everyone needs accountability in sticking to a goal that they've set. That's particularly true with fitness goals, whether it's eating or exercise. People like to have exercise buddies -- someone to go on a run with or to check-in with online or on the phone to report their workouts. With eating, it helps too to have a friend or relative to either compete with (one friend of mine is having a "Biggest Loser" contest with her brothers and sisters right now) or to motivate. My mom once said she'd pay me $100 if I lost my college weight . I've checked in with friends on the Video Fitness forum for years with my workout. I've e-mailed friends about my eating goals, working side by side with them. Sometimes I can do it alone, other times it's extra helpful to have someone to be accountable to.

Well, guess what? I need you to help me with my accountability. In the past (well recent past -- since I've really improved my eating habits), I've found that once I get going with eating better, I do really well. It's almost effortless. But those first few days are crazy hard. I've been experiencing this crazy hard phase for the past few months. Ever since I was sick in February and my appetite came back, I've struggled with eating healthy consistently. Oft times I'm eating healthy foods, but am eating too much of the grains and healthy sugars. Too much of a good thing is still too much. I've been gaining weight and I don't like having my pants fit so tight.

So I bought a new scale at Costco this afternoon. My friend (the one doing "The Biggest Loser" with her family) borrowed my scale over a month ago and I've found it has been easier to ignore the weight gain without *really* knowing the facts. That time is over. I'm weighing in tomorrow morning and my glory days of eating too much are gone. Time for glory days with self-control.

I don't want to do this, but I'm going to *ugh* plan out my eating before I eat it. I am so bad with saying "this is what I'm going to eat tomorrow" or even the next meal in specifics. I like the freedom and the whim of eating whatever whenever. I don't think this chaotic approach is all that helpful. So I'll write in here each morning, noon, or whenever what I'm going to eat and what I do eat for 30 days. Think I can do it? I'm thinking now I may be a little crazy, but I've got to do it so I can get back in the driver's seat. I love self-control more than I love to just eat what I want when I want it.

I'll log the first day on this blog (and copy it to my reneeonrawfood blog so I can have it all recorded there). After that, I'll do the details on that blog and will just comment on aspects of what's on my mind with it all on here. If you want to have access to the other blog, just let me know and I'll add you on. I restricted it a few weeks ago because I started feeling like I was writing that out to the whole world and for some reason my lack of perfection there seemed like something to keep more private -- like any of us are perfect. But those were my thoughts and hesitations at the time. Perhaps I'll change it back later on.

See you tomorrow on here. *Hanging my head like "what have I done?"*